TAG me!
Entries for November, 2005
OMG! OMG!!    I got less than 40 days to finish my thesis. Oh please don't ask how was it. I AM SO STRESSED OUT! *cries* I'm panicking  Just by thinking about it makes my body tremble with fear. And at times, I cry. I don't wanna fail again... I don't wanna fail again... May God help me. -------------------------------------- I'll just put a timer somewhere in my page so that I would remember my priority. |
I have a friend (who I won't mention his name) who is going astray. He's almost same age as me. He's smart, but a little egoistic (and he will never admit that). Our so-called "barkada" is mostly composed of ages 23's and 24's. Maybe that's why we bond easily. But none of us haven't finished college yet. One of us got married early, but he got a job, thankfully. The other one is also trying his best to get into college without support from his mom, and he's also near from graduating. I am also currently persuing my studies now, eventhough I am already 7 years in college. I'm a little embarassed by that, but yet, I'm proud. I still wanted to finish school how long it may take me. The other one, well... I don't know. He's like the married guy who got tired of school. But unlike the married guy, he isn't improving himself that much. Maybe he will be really, really furious when he sees this post. But I don't care anymore. Dude, I am SO concerned with you. Your family really wants you to finish school. But look at what you are doing! You don't even know what your priorities are! You don't even have to worry about money because your elder brother and sister can support you. But look at you! Geez... Just like what somebody have told me, "Kung kailan sya tumanda, tsaka naging pasaway..." -------------------------------- When I was talking about this with a friend, I told her that, "To tell you the truth, I don't have the right to tell him about this because I see myself in him. Parang pareho lang kami. Maybe someday, I'll tell him. But I still need to prove something for myself." She told me, "Kuya, compared to him mas angat ka. Kasi you find ways to finish school and earn money (I'll just delete the next line, medyo harsh kasi). Hanga nga parents ko sa yo kasi you strive hard to finish your degree." And I will... -------------------------------- Alam ko gagawin mo kung sakali mang mabasa mo to. Malamang eh i-ja-justify mo na naman mga kilos mo. Grow-up and Wake up, pare! Di na tama ginagawa mo... |
Earlier today, she was planning to treat the family for a movie. But we can't decide what to watch. There are no good titles as of that moment. And besides, each of us have something to do. So we canceled the plan. 10 pm that evening. After days of stress, my cousin Jasmine gave us a treat in Starbucks somewhere in Alabang. I don't really know what's up, but its a treat anyway. Why not, di ba? But Tita Mely doesn't want to go with us, so we (Kuya Ryan, Ate Jas, Ray and me) went on without her. That night was sort of a bonding between siblings. Dami naming napag-kwentuhan sa Starbucks. About problems with our family, love-life, mga experiences. Ate Yeye (Ate Jas' pet name) even told us who are those guys who is she talking to everyday in phone. And one was a very well-known sports guy. The rest of us got shocked with what she said that moment. AMP! Sya yun?! "Biruin mo isa sya sa top 50 greatest ___________ tapos nakikipagbiru-biruan lang ako. Minsan nasasabihan ko pa sya ng 'gago ka talaga...' ", she added. Wow ha. Bigtime ka talaga ate... And we had a really, really great time over a cup of coffee. |
Note: May mga larawan kami sa ibaba. Pero pakibasa muna ang post na ito. DUMATING SI TITO EDDIE kahapon nang umaga kasama ang kanyang pamilya. Napagplanuhan pala nila nung isang linggo pa na ipapasyal nya ang mag-ina nya sa zoo na nabanggit nina Ray at Kuya Ryan sa kanya. Ang anak kasi nyang si Luigi ay di pa nakakapunta sa zoo, at magandang pagkakataon ito. Mahilig pa naman sa mga hayop sa Luigi. Alas-syete na ng umaga nung maka-gayak kami. Patungo kami sa zoo na "Avilon" ang tawag, isang pasyalan sa may Rizal. Maganda raw doon ayon sa dalawang insan kong lalaki. Di pala sumama si Ate Yeye, may trabaho daw sya. Nakasakay sa MU ako, si Ray, si Luigi, at ang kasintahan ni Ray na si SG. Nasa Rav4 naman si Tita Lorna at Tito Eddie, na driver nila si Kuya Ryan. ------------------------------------ ISANG TRAHEDYA SA DAAN. Alas-diyes ng umaga. Sa isang medyo makipot na kalye sa may San Mateo, patungo na ang aming pangkat sa zoo. Nauuna ang aming sasakyan, at nakabuntot lamang sa malayo ang Rav4 nina kuya Ryan. Maya't maya pa'y napansin na lang namin na nawawala na ang sana'y nakabuntot sa aming likuran. Kaya nagsimula na kaming mag-alala. Tinawagan ni Ray sa cel si Kuya Ryan, pero walang nasagot. Kaya sinubukan nya ang cel ni Tito Eddie. Nagulat na lang kami sa sinabi nya... na nakabangga raw sila ng isang batang lalaki. Kinabahan kami. Pero hindi naman kami naniniwala na siryoso ang lagay ng bata sa dahilang halos imposible kang makakapag-bilis ng sasakyan sa ganoong-kakipot na daanan. Kaya naman nagmaniobra si Ray pabalik sa kinalalagyan ng kabilang sasakyan. Nakita namin na huminto sila sa isang maliit na klinika, at inihatid ang bata doon. Pero sinabihan sila na dalhin ang bata sa isang mas malaking hospital na medyo malapit lamang. Kaya dali-dali nilang sinugod sa hospital ang batang lalaki. Sa hospital, nakita kong kasama na pala ng bata ang kanyang mga magulang. Tinignan ng doktor ang itwasyon, at nakita namang hindi grabe. Pero kinailangan pa ng mas masusing pagsusuri, at ginamitan ng x-ray para mas sigurado. Buti na lang kasama ni Kuya si Tito Ed. Sinalo na lang ni Tito Ed ang gastos. Shock pa rin si Kuya Ryan sa mga pangyayari. Ngayon lang kasi sya nakabundol ng tao. At nalaman na rin ang totoong dahilan. Kasalanan pala ng bata. Bigla-bigla palang tumawid. Inamin naman ng bata. Buti na lang di grabe ang lagay nya. At walang nabaling buto. Alas-onse, itinuloy na namin ang pagpasyal sa zoo. ------------------------------------ Ilang minuto ang nakaraan, nakarating na kami sa Montalban, Rizal. Kung saan nandoon ang Avilon. Sa papasok pa lang, sari-saring mga ibong-pantubig ang makikita mo. Iba't ibang klaseng gansa, swan, bibe, at iba pa. May tour guide na kailangan naming sundan. At aabutin daw ang 2 oras ang paglilibot. at ito ang ilan sa mga larawan na kuha namin:  Isang uri ng ibon na mula sa lahi ng "Fowl" o manok.Dito nalaman ko na ang tamang tawag pala sa mga ibon na ito ay "Peafowl". Hindi basta-basta "Peacock". And Peacock ay lalaki, at Peahen ay babae. Si Ugly Duckling. Hindi yung swan ang sinasabi ko... hehehe. Ang Kalaw. Hindi ito yung isang kalye sa Maynila. Ang "Armadillo" Si Luigi, ang aking 10-taong pinsan, kasama ang mga Parrot Ang Tuko. Bow. Ang tuko ay mahigpit kung kumapit. Bow. Ang emo nang isang ito... Sama ng tingin sa akin o! Sea Otters. Meron pala sa Palawan nito. Baby Ostrich Isang hayop na meron ata ako sa bituka ko... Ang Capybara pala ang pinakamalaking daga sa mundo. Maari itong lumaki na mas malaki pa sa aso. Isipin mo na lang kung ang mga daga sa bahay natin ganyan kalaki... At sa mga nakita kong hayop, ito ang pinaka natatawa ako... ang Avilon Scandal (nakalimutan ko kung anong hayop ito)Scandal (posing 1), Scandal (posing 2), Scandal (posing 3) nyahahaha  Hindi arwana to. MAS malaki pa sa Arwana raw ang mag ito. Mukhang nasanay na sila na pinapakain ng tao, kaya naman pag may mga taong nanonood, nagtitipon-tipon sila sa tabi. Sinubuhan ko silang pakainin ng 3 ulo ng manok. Grabe, sa laki ng bibig nila, isang isda, isang ulo ng manok. Miniature Horse Ang pamilya ni Tito Ed. Luigi at baby tiger Ang girfriend ni Ray na si SG, mahilig sa hayop. Di kaya yun ang dahilan kung bakit nya nagustuhan si Ray? nyehehehe Kuya Ryan at si baby Tiger Mukhang nagulat ata yung bata sa likod ko, parang sinasakal ko yung baby tiger. TAKE TWO! Ayaaaan... mas ok to. Ang cute di ba? Ako ang ibig ko sabihin. NYAHAHAHA! Kafal. Ako at si mommy tiger. Usyoso sa isang video sa cel. ------------------------------------ Pagkatapos namin dun, mga pasado ala-una na ng hapon, nanaghalian kami sa Dencio's sa Eastwood, Libis. Sarap pala ng Sisig dun!  ~~ Sinigang na salmon sa sampalok, bottomless iced tea, crispy pata, garlic rice. Nabusog kami sobra. Marap talaga lalo na kapag libre hehehe...----------------------------------- Nung pauwi na kami, humiwalay na sina Ray at SG. Ako rin ay bumaba sa isang kalye papuntang SM Megamall. May meeting kasi ako nun sa hapon. May meeting ang mga martials ng Hero Channel launching. May mga pamilyar na mukha akong kasama. Buti naman. Nainis lang ako nung hindi dumating si Dan at Nico, na dapat kasama rin. Nalaman ko na na-assign pala kami sa cosplay event. |
It's been already 2 years since I started blogging here (Nov. 15, 2003). This is not actually my first blog. I used to blog in Blogger. But I got really fund of here, and this has been my main blog since then. I really love Calvin and Hobbes. This series of comics by Mr. Watterson remind me of my youthful years. Actually, this is the second time I created a Tabulas template which is inspired by Calvin and Hobbes. Happy 2 years of blogging to me! And more memories to share with you 
|
OMG may palpak sa Template ko amp. Pati tagboard ko ata nasira ko pa. mamaya na lang, dami ako gagawin. Dito na lang kayo mag-tag hehehe. Ang hirap gumawa talaga ng site na compatible pareho sa IE at firefox. |
The event, from my view. I've been waiting for this day. It was Shawine who informed me about this volunteering at the Hero Channel grand launching event. And Dan made sure I'm in the group. So, I was there. Last friday, in the day before the event, we went on a meeting in PTTC where the event would be held. We organized ourselves, jotted down thing to bring and do, organized the cosplay area. By the way, our group was assigned to organize the cosplay event. Our leader is Robert Wong, a guy from filcosplay.tk and Henry. Good thing I have friends in the group like Nico, Dan, Carlo and Louanne. I've met Jewel sometime before, and I've seen her a couple of times in cosplay events. There are also new faces like Joselle, Gni, Jose, Aaron, and Zae. All of them are very nice people. Too bad Dan didn't make it last Saturday because of school. ----------------------------------- THE BIG DAY. I woke at 4:30 in the morning and prepared myself physically and mentally. I knew that this weekend will be very tiresome. I intentionally dressed up like some security personnel: black shirt, black baggy army pants, shiny leather shoes. And the night before, I even went to a barber to cut my hair short. Flat tops again. LOL. Nico and I met in Taft Avenue corner Gil Puyat, and went through. The group prepared early. The admin also gave us yellow Hero shirts (too bad it doesn't fit me). Everybody were assigned to their proper posts. Carlo is the event's host. Louanne, Joselle and Aaron are in the registration. The others, like me, have no fixed position because our jobs change depending on the situation and time. But at first, I was assigned in the queue of cosplayers who are about to sign up for the event. Robert, Henry, and Aaron oriented me and Zae on the details. So we organized the queue and answer every questions of the would-be contestants. A lot of problems also arised like about the 3-piece picture requirement. A cosplayer needed to submit 3 pictures of their anime character in order to be qualified. But it seemed that ABS-CBN failed to put that in their advertisements, and caused us a lot of headache. Even some parents went mad at us because of that. We've just let them know that we are just following orders. Later on, I got assigned to take control of the crowd at the corner of the cosplay area. Thankfully, Nonoy, the bouncer, was there to help. I was also needed to guard the things of the cosplayers. ----------------------------------- Everybody was so busy that day, but having fun at the same time.  At the end of the day, everything seems to be ok. And I think we did great! :D |
Marunong din pala mapagod ang puso. Marahil ganun lang nga talaga. Pero ayoko magsalita ng tapos. Napakatagal na panahon akong naghihintay, at naramdaman ko na naghihintay pala ako sa wala. Nagmukha na akong tanga. Pero ayun ako, parang aso na naghihintay sa amo para mapansin ako. OO. Naghintay ako. At NAPAKARAMING bagay ko nang ginawa na hindi ko na pala dapat ginagawa, dahil hindi ko na responsibilidad yun. Marahil ganun lang siguro talaga pag-inlove ka di ba? Siguro nahimasmasan na ko kaya nasasabi ko ang mga bagay na ito. Unti-unti na kong nagising. Siguro kailangan ko na maging masaya para sa sarili ko. Karapatan ko rin yun. ------------------------------------ ...Therefore, be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams; it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. - Desiderata |
Dear Lord, Thanks for everything. Eventhough I don't have much, but still I survive in my everyday life. Thank you very much because you always surround me with people who can help me, who loves me, and cares. Thank you because I have perfect health, and you took care of my family and friends. Thank you for giving me another chance to get into school. But right now, my Lord, I really need your help. I'm loosing hope again, and I'm loosing confidence in my own abilities... |
Napansin ko lang. halos lahat ng blog na madaanan ko puro kwento nila nakapanood sila ng Harry Potter 4. Wala lang. zzzz.... |
Assume that you love your bf/gf very much and your friends are very dear to you. If you can, please justify your answer in the comments. Thanks. |
It looks like I've been interacting with a lots of broken-hearted people lately. Coincidence? Or is it broken-hearts season? Or maybe because Christmas is near? LOL. I'm not sure. Just a few days ago, I was chatting with a friend of mine. Broken-hearted, of course. She tought that this guy loves him, until she learned that this guy has a crush her friend. Ouch. She's so down until now. I talked to her, hoping that I could help. We talked only for a few minutes, and this is a part of what she said: Funny, I used to be like that. Atat magka-gf. Desperate. LOL. And I honestly admit that. Then I just realized that I'm still not ready. I'm not sure why. Maybe I'm still not mature enough. Or maybe I'm not sure if I can handle such relationships. But one thing's for sure, I'm still looking for myself. I still hate myself for a lot of reasons, and I don't know if I could love someone if I don't love myself. And so I just continue hearing everyone's own stories of love. May I could learn something from them. And maybe when she comes, I'm already prepared. I'll just enjoy my solitude for a while... ------------------------------- And again, this is for you, people with broken hearts. |
It's 3:30am and I'm still very much alive! hehe. Well, I just feel ranting right now. I don't feel good, actually. It's because our thesis defense is almost near, but we're still not finished. There are lot of complications and problems I encountered during my research. When I created the proposal, I admit that I didn't research enough about my topic. So I tried producing a thesis proposal with a very shallow explanation of my program, and tried puting complicated technical terms so it may sound so "hi-tech". Actually, I thought it would be easy to do. And that's what I thought. As I widen my research, I realized that I am dealing with a far more complicated idea. I thought that I should just have to learn 2 new programming tools, but instead, I needed to learn more than that. And learning new stuff ate a lot of my time. And I am running out of time. My defense is at December 11, just a few more days from now. I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere, and my family has been pressuring me. And in addition to that, I am dragging my friend Roy with me. I'm really, really losing hope that I could finish this semester. May God help me. ------------------------------------- Two days ago, I was really happy to see some of my closest friends online. I haven't talked to them for a while. I missed them. Sarah, Kim, Tere... Like what I've told Kim, I'm always so eager to see a friend right now. Because I've been living like a total hermit for a few months. ------------------------------------- It's has been fun teaching you Nix. I really love to teach people who's so eager to learn my stuff. I used to give Visual Basic 6.0 tutorial to highschool students like Bible and Dainty, eventhough they won't have to use that later on in college. LOL. ------------------------------------- What am I thinking right now? I'm wishing that the earth would just swallow me alive and die. Why? A few hours ago, Nilo, an old college, pm'd me at Y!M. I was so nervous and so ashamed at myself at the same time. It's because he has progressed a lot since both of us took our OJT at Lucent Technologies. I've learned a lot there, and so was he. But the difference is that he already graduated, and I'm still here, a nobody. Maybe I'm a little insecured, and totally ashamed. And he also mentioned that he's in vietnam right now for a company project. And guess what? He's still under our old boss from Lucent, Darwin. Oh my God. That guy has been expecting a lot from me, and I got him disappointed. He told me that I was his best student he got in OJT, and I'm still a freaking nobody. *sigh* I am so sorry Darwin, and I owe you a lot of things I know. I really feel like crying right now. I want to die. 
|
BASED ON THE TASKS LEFT TO DO OVER THE TIME LEFT, I therefore conclude that I won't make it in time to defend my thesis. Yes, I'm backing out for a while. It's so hard to explain, and so many complications came. I have to redesign the flow of program, change the programming language to use, and so many other things. *sigh* I'm still not sure what to do next. I don't know how will I tell this to my family, or to my DEAN. I talked to Roy about this, and we are still thinking what to do. But I'm not giving up without a fight. I still have to do many things before December 11, the day of thesis defense. Oh no. Please don't tell me, "YOU CAN DO IT!" because it truly is virtually impossible for now. Maybe next semester. Hopefully. --------------------------- Maraming salamat sa mga kaibigan ko na laging nagpapalakas ng loob ko. Di nyo lang alam kung gaano nyo napapagaan ang loob ko. Maraming salamat. Kim, Dainty, Tere, Cae, Nix... at sa mga hindi ko nabanggit. You know who you are. |
